My dearest, C. How thrilling it was to see you take your first step this evening before bed, while in the room that you and your sister share. Words fail me, as I see you grow so fast. It seems that I go to work, come home, and you have grown, gained strength, grew another tooth, expressed a new sound, and today, took your first step.
As Father's Day approaches, I am reminded that how I feel is similar to how God feels about us as his children. He so wants the best for us, yet allows us to grow, take our steps and determine our path with the grace He gives ever present to direct our path to him, who waits for us with open and loving arms.
My prayer is that I will be able to live up to my responsibility to be a good father to you. And, support all your steps in life with as much love as I can learn from God.
Oh, congratulations, little one, my little "dewdrop" on your first step. And, thank you, for saving it for me until I got home.
Love, Papa
Showing posts with label personal_reflection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal_reflection. Show all posts
B - First Purchase: Chocolate Chip Cookies
What a delight, after having a Subway vegetarian sandwich with you for lunch today, you decided it was time for the usual chocolate chip cookies. At first, you said, "Buy it, papa..." Not wanting to miss this opportunity, I gave you $5.00 and encouraged you to get in line and make your own purchase.
As you coyly walked up to the line, assessing what you were about to do, your pace slowed. Then, you stopped, did an aboutface, and ran back to me and said, "I too shy..." with that cute little tilt of the head as commonly seen in your photos.
I said with a smile and shrug of the shoulders, "Then I guess you don't get any cookies today..." Well, that steadied your nerves, and off to get in line you went. You waited for a few moments patiently, with $5.00 in hand, as each customer made his or her purchase. As you approached the counter, the lady was quite nice in trying to help you decide if you wanted chocolate chip or "some with M&Ms?" At that point, I could see you needed a little help and stepped in, stood behind you and helped to clarify your wish.
You took two chocolate chip cookies, tried very hard to reach the coin return for your change by standing on your toes, still to no avail, and were satisfied to let me retrieve the change and smiled brightly to receive three one-dollar bills from the clerk instead.
One cookie for me and one for you. Life couldn't get any better for you or for me.
I will always remember that moment. The moment was priceless.
Thank you, Lord for chocolate chip cookies.
As you coyly walked up to the line, assessing what you were about to do, your pace slowed. Then, you stopped, did an aboutface, and ran back to me and said, "I too shy..." with that cute little tilt of the head as commonly seen in your photos.
I said with a smile and shrug of the shoulders, "Then I guess you don't get any cookies today..." Well, that steadied your nerves, and off to get in line you went. You waited for a few moments patiently, with $5.00 in hand, as each customer made his or her purchase. As you approached the counter, the lady was quite nice in trying to help you decide if you wanted chocolate chip or "some with M&Ms?" At that point, I could see you needed a little help and stepped in, stood behind you and helped to clarify your wish.
You took two chocolate chip cookies, tried very hard to reach the coin return for your change by standing on your toes, still to no avail, and were satisfied to let me retrieve the change and smiled brightly to receive three one-dollar bills from the clerk instead.
One cookie for me and one for you. Life couldn't get any better for you or for me.
I will always remember that moment. The moment was priceless.
Thank you, Lord for chocolate chip cookies.
Nibble Nose
Many blessing, my little "nibble nose."
Love,
Papa
"Carry You, Papa?"
B,
I seldom turn you down, when you ask, "Carry you, Papa..." Usually, I reply, "I will always carry you, for as long as I am able." I realize this time is brief, so I cherish any moment for us to be close. Moments like these, along with times I can help you with a straw, or I am impressed with your existence is beyond measure.
Moments as simple as helping you with a straw engulf me at times, as I stare into your little eyes, as you innocently guide the straw to its use, which gives you so much relief from thrust, or pleasure, when we share a "Jamba Juice" together.
One night, I mentioned, a comet could not impress me as does your life.
Thank you, Father in heaven, for B...
I seldom turn you down, when you ask, "Carry you, Papa..." Usually, I reply, "I will always carry you, for as long as I am able." I realize this time is brief, so I cherish any moment for us to be close. Moments like these, along with times I can help you with a straw, or I am impressed with your existence is beyond measure.
Moments as simple as helping you with a straw engulf me at times, as I stare into your little eyes, as you innocently guide the straw to its use, which gives you so much relief from thrust, or pleasure, when we share a "Jamba Juice" together.
One night, I mentioned, a comet could not impress me as does your life.
Thank you, Father in heaven, for B...
A Dewdrop Comes into Our Lives
Dewdrop,
When you came into the world, like your sister, you did not delay in coming. It was a joy to be there when you arrived, for both myself and your sister, "B."
While B and I stood at the head of the bed, anticipating your arrival, I wondered if B would mind being there. The nurses said it would be okay, as long as I was okay with it. B remarked, while you were just arriving, "Mommy owey?" "Yes, mommy owey," I replied.
Oh, we must not forget, your grandmother, M, was there, too. Shortly after you arrived. All of us were so happy to announce your new name, which we kept a secret (even B knew, but didn't tell anyone).
After I cut the umbilical cord, took some pictures and dressed you, that is when you got the name dewdrop. You seemed so tiny and cute, the name came naturally out of my mouth... "She's like a little dewdrop."
You are certainly an added blessing to my life, as well as our family's.
I thank God for you as our newest gift.
Much love,
Papa
When you came into the world, like your sister, you did not delay in coming. It was a joy to be there when you arrived, for both myself and your sister, "B."
While B and I stood at the head of the bed, anticipating your arrival, I wondered if B would mind being there. The nurses said it would be okay, as long as I was okay with it. B remarked, while you were just arriving, "Mommy owey?" "Yes, mommy owey," I replied.
Oh, we must not forget, your grandmother, M, was there, too. Shortly after you arrived. All of us were so happy to announce your new name, which we kept a secret (even B knew, but didn't tell anyone).
After I cut the umbilical cord, took some pictures and dressed you, that is when you got the name dewdrop. You seemed so tiny and cute, the name came naturally out of my mouth... "She's like a little dewdrop."
You are certainly an added blessing to my life, as well as our family's.
I thank God for you as our newest gift.
Much love,
Papa
Knock Them Over Once, Twice and Again and Again
It is so much fun to watch you first test the boxes with your little pointer finger, just to make sure they are ready to go; then, you give a great big push and topple they go.
It only takes me a few seconds to restack them for you, once, twice and again and again.
What joy!
A Journey of Faith Starts with a Humble Heart
I wish I could say I have always had that conviction, but I can't. I have been that Prodigal Son (Pope: In Forgiveness We See the True Heart of God) at various moments in my life, as most have to some degree or another; I have gone away from a relationship with the Lord and have had to deal with the consequences. However, as in the story, there is a road back. All that is necessary is for one to have a humble heart to get back on the road and begin the long walk home, dirty, fatigued, bruised and often times with regrets. In any case, all hope is not lost. On the contrary, there is great hope that is gained.
One of the most vivid impressions on my mind and heart is experiencing the open arms of my then priest, "Fr. Don", at St. Elizabeth Seton (in about the year 2004), when I heard him say after confession,"Welcome home." There was nothing more refreshing to my soul than those two words, "Welcome home" (for more information, see The Sacrament of Penance).
Are you far from home? If so, ask yourself, "Where am I headed? What is my destination? Do I want my children to follow me here?" The answer to your questions may take some time, or not. In any case, an answer is needed (The Coming Home Network International).
May this blog and what I share be a help to you as others have been to me on the journey of faith; and, may it point you to Christ, who will provide you all the inspiration, comfort and guidance you will ever need.
God bless, Ed.
P.S. I placed this timeline at the beginning of this blog, as I will modify it as the Lord permits.
A Man Fell in a Hole
1964 - Baptized in the Church of St. Alphonsus, Los Angeles, CA
1969 - I have a "spiritual awakening."
1973 - "Something inside calls" to become a priest. The dream never materializes. At that time, I thought, "What greater calling is there than to service our Lord." Later spent some time with a mentor at St. Vincent's Seminary (now De Paul Evangelization Center), however the doors to education do not open here for unknown reasons. Attend with grandmother St. Benedict Catholic Church, Montebello, CA, where one priest is not so pleased I have many questions about the Catholic faith. A few other priests don't mind, however, attending to a voracious appetite for answers. Later, one in particular, "Fr. Bernie", welcomes and encourages my questions; he later becomes a spiritual mentor and friend.
1979 - Received the Holy Sacrament of Confirmation. Volunteer at Beverly Hospital and begin to learn about the temporal aspects of life and reality of death.
1980 - Participated in Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Learned the Bible had an Old and New Testament. Spiritual advisor, Dave M., "Coach" (P.E. coach of Montebello High School, Los Angels, CA), teaches me how to find scripture and why there are so many books in the Bible. With his guidance, participate and study in small student prayer group.
1982 - Fr. Bernard O'Rorouke, "Bernie", gifts to me The Art of Christian Listening (1980), signed to him by the author, Thomas N. Hart, with the inscription, "It's been a pleasure having you in the course, Bernie. Blessings on you and your ministry. - Tom Hart"
1984 - Left the Catholic faith in favor of a Calvary Chapel (Downey, CA) approach to worship. I desire to study Christian apologetics at Weaton Collge (the door remains closed). Reading Evidence that Demands a Verdict (Josh McDowell) and learn "To every man an answer" (Dr. Walter Martin).
1985 - Dear friend and mentor, Fr. Bernard O'Rorouke dies from Multiple Sclerosis.
1991
- Following personal loss, begins a period of several years when I leave the faith and deny the existence of God.
- Many years pass without a firm belief in anything "spiritual" except that it is important to always pursue the truth and deal with whatever is revealed.
1998 - I remain agnostic and mindful of what I have learned. An appropriate scripture for this time is, "The word of God is something alive and active: it cuts more incisively than any two-edged sword: it can seek out the place where soul is divided from spirit, or joints from marrow; it can pass judgement on secret emotions and thoughts" (Hebrews 4:12).
2000 - Reading Evidence that Demands a Verdict and lean the historical significance of the life of Christ and to defend the faith with rational thought.
2000 - Reading Evidence that Demands a Verdict and lean the historical significance of the life of Christ and to defend the faith with rational thought.
2002
- At the bookstore, I stand in front of hundreds of "religious" books, thinking, "I need something not so touchy-feely. Something that is based on history." Find what I am looking for. Later, Fr. Benedict J. Groeschel, CFR replies (March 25, 2002) to letter I sent to express deep appreciation for what In The Presence of Our Lord - The History, Theology, and Psychology of Eucharistic Devotion has meant for my life and understanding of the The Real Presence of our Lord.
- Eyes opened, my life is changed and I can no longer deny God and what Jesus has done. Thus begins the walk back to the faith of my now deceased grandmother. No longer agnostic, longing to satisfy the yearning to be Catholic and understand our history.
- Unlike in the year 1991, a truly God centered life begins to emerge and can be beautifully summarized in the Apostle's Creed (for history on the Apostle's Creed, see Catholic Encyclopedia).
2003
- Discover Eucharistic Adoration at St. Elizabeth Seton (Carlsbad, CA) and read, Praying in the Presence of Our Lord with the Saints (Fr. Benedict J. Groeschell and James Monti, 2000).
- Register for Adoration (1:00 a.m.) to better understand the experience of being with the Lord and dealing with weakness: "He came back to the disciples and found them sleeping , and he said to Peter, 'So you had not the strength to stay awake with me for one hour? Stay awake, and pray not to be put to the test. The spirit is willing enough, but human nature is weak'" (Matthew 26:40-41).
- Reading More than a Carpenter (Josh McDowell, 2004).
- 1st child, "Baby 'B'" is born. First blog entry as a Catholic dad, mindful of a new role and responsibility to receiving the gift of a child. Blog is under another name, which I will give to my children when older.
- My faith is solidified as I feel at home and after going to confession, which I had not done since my youth.
- Prayer and reflection on scripture is more and more important, as are fellowship and learning about Catholic authors.
2005
- Discover Eternal Word Television Network (EWTN), which significantly contributes to my education on the Catholic faith.
- Facilitate San Diego Catholic Dads group at St. Elizabeth Seton, Carlsbad, CA.
- Find the Knights of Columbus, local men with CatholicMen.org and other brothers a welcoming fellowship and source of encouragement.
- Discover How the Catholic Church Built Western Civilization (Thomas E. Woods Junior, 2005).
2006 - 2nd child, "My Dewdrop" is born. I find "My Breath" (Images).
2008
- Discuss extensively with colleague, professor and friend, Donna E. the value to parents having a "Life Story" for their children and subsequent generations. We discuss using blogs and other medium to tell "Our Stories, Our Lives".
- CatholicDads.org is registered.
- YouTube account established to integrate and utilize "multi-media" outreach.
- The issues related to promoting the sanctity of life dominate my mind and attention. My Christian brother, Steve F. educates me extensively on this topic and I become actively involved in promoting the dignity of life.
- Understanding about Mary the Mother of God becomes more and more clear.
- Captivated by My Lord during a personal retreat.
- Consider and eventually become an Oblate Novice of St. Benedict with Prince of Peace Abbey (Oceanside, CA) and begin to activate my faith in the community under the encouragement and education of Br. Daniel Sokol, O.S.B.
- Begin reading through Catechism of the Catholic Church (U.S. Catholic Church, 1995) for a second time (for online version, see Catechism of the Catholic Church hosted by St. Charles Borromeo, Picayune, Mississippi).
- God in the Streets of New York City (Grassroots Films Inc.) chosen for CatholicDads.org blog, as it carries the essential message for all time.
- Attention is focused on promoting the Miracle of Life and education on the sanctity of life, from birth to death.
- "During one of the greatest challenges my family and I face, I find joy in my children...and continue to depend on the Lord for wisdom" (Video).
- CatholicDads.org registers 50,000 page views prior to migrating from a static site to blog format.
- CatholicDadsHQ.com is registered following conviction a more active role in sharing the Catholic faith is essential to continued spiritual growth and meeting the needs of the Catholic dads community.
- Establish local Catholic business owners network (currently at 35 members) to promote B2B support and exchange of information and to mentor next generation of Catholic professionals.
- Identify need for Catholic counselors to network via one online publication to promote all aspects of mental health. Launch Catholic Counseling Today - "The question confronting the Church today is not any longer whether the man in the street can grasp a religious message, but how to employ the communication media so as to let him have the full impact of the Gospel message." -- Pope John Paul II
- The Lord's impression is everywhere and in "Reflections of Faith" (Images).
- Service to the Catholic dads community continues. - "Faith formation is job #1"
2011
- After eight years of prayer, answer found through Saint John Chrysostom (Magnificat. Vol. 13, No. 7. Tuesday, September 13), to continue on present course / ministry to meet the needs of individuals and families everywhere at risk of impaired functioning.
1982 - "Bernie" gives me a book that I hold onto for over a decade and proves to be a seed to a career yet undetermined. Now, the year is 2011 and I curiously discover on page 39, the scripture Mark 12:29-31 is bracketed: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind and with all your strength...You shall love your neighbor as yourself." In 2010, Catholic Dads HQ is established with the tagline, "Strengthening: Heart, Soul and Mind".
1985 - Dear friend and mentor, Fr. Bernard O'Rorouke - "I miss you brother. You were an inspiration to my life and you showed me God was not afraid of my doubts."
2004 - My first child teaches me how to love beyond self.
2005 - Image used for San Diego Catholic Dads flyer.
2006 - My second child teach me love has no limits.
San Diego, CA - October 1, 2021 - CatholicDadsHQ.com launches a new website with the assistance of eCatholic.com. Catholic Dads HQ has a firm commitment to promote the Catholic faith, educate and support Catholic dads in the U.S. and abroad. Catholic Dads HQ is currently seeking and reaching out to Catholic therapists specializing in the needs of men of faith. The mission? To empower Catholic dads to continue their devotion to the formation of their children in the dimensions of spirit, soul, and body (1 Thessalonians 5:23).
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